Ever shared your brilliant business idea with friends and family, only to receive a chorus of "that's a good idea!"

That's actually terrible feedback.

People close to you will almost always tell you your idea is amazing. Because they like you!
They are vested in making you feel better, even though in the long term this can be detrimental.

It's really easy for founders to ask wrong questions in search for validation for their ideas, and often to wrong people. Let's explore why.

False validations are a thing

Author Rob Fitzpatrick, in his book "The Mom Test," argues that traditional feedback methods often lead us astray. People, even those closest to us, tend to sugarcoat their opinions or tell us what they think we want to hear.

This can leave us building products and businesses nobody actually wants.

Here's the core principle: Instead of asking leading questions like "would you use this?" or "do you think this is a good idea?", focus on uncovering past behaviors and struggles.

A second trap is asking questions to people who are not our end users.

Would you ask your dating coach for investment advice?

Would you ask your investment advisor for relationship advice?

You get the point, right?

Here's a specific approach that can overcome these bias-laden false validations.

Ask open-ended questions

Open-ended questions are questions where the interviewee has to give thoughtful long form answers, not yes and no.
This helps you uncover their actual pain points, instead of accidentally forcing your solution.

• Instead of: "Do you struggle with remembering grocery lists?"

• Ask: "Tell me about a time you forgot something important on your grocery list."

• This shift encourages detailed narratives and reveals real-life experiences.

Focus on past behavior, not hypothetical situations

• Instead of: "Would you pay for a grocery delivery service?"

• Ask: "Have you ever used a grocery delivery service, and why or why not?"

• Past actions offer a more reliable indicator of future behavior than hypothetical scenarios.

Listen for "reveals," not "tells"

• "Tells" are opinions and desires, often unreliable.

• "Reveals" are stories and experiences that uncover underlying needs and pain points.

• Example: If someone says, "I wouldn't use a grocery delivery service because it's too expensive" (a "tell"), use the Five Whys technique to dig deeper. Ask "Why is it too expensive?" and continue asking why until you understand the underlying reasons behind their resistance, such as delivery fees exceeding their budget or concerns about the quality of delivered fresh produce (the "reveals").

Listen patiently to uncover the Black Swan

Every conversation has the potential to uncover a unique insight- a black swan- that can change the perception.

The best way to uncover it is by letting the interviewee talk the most.

• Founders often feel the need to feel validated and take over the conversation. It's really easy to do subconsciously if you are not careful.

• If they are not talking over 60% of the time, you're doing it wrong.

  
  

By following these principles, you can have honest conversations that reveal genuine customer needs. This allows you to validate your idea and build a product or service that solves real problems for real people, increasing your chances of success.

It isn't about getting a pat on the back.

It's about getting the harsh truth, learning from it, and iterating your idea until it truly resonates with your target audience.